a lot has happend and my head feels kinda fuzzy so ill try writing my thaughts here i think... soo uhh hey notes program! nvm this is so akward i never really write anything uhhhh... anyways this my third day here and strangely eventho its all super confusing i feel...fine? dont get me wrong dying was seriously awful but i feel normal like my body feels normal. or maybe im just glad i dont have to go to work anymore haha. i guess i didnt leave much behind anyways wow thats depressing. the people here are weird tho morti kinda freaks me out i mean he seems harmless enaugh but hes not human man like i can definatly tell... i saw his eyes for a glimpse yesterday and got goosebumps jesus christ. and that isaac guy keeps teasing me. whats he so mean for anyways its not like hes that pretty to look at he shoud take care of that first before coming after me! well sorry for the vent.. wait why am i appologizing its not like anyone will read this besides me lol
U THOUGHT HAHA XD! is this ur diary? thats so lame lolz kinda cute but mostly lame also watch what you say abt my looks. you know we SHARE this pc right?
wow this is embaressing.
ok i talked to olive and she installed a password for the notes so theyre safe now :) shes so nice... eventho shes a demon she feels way more normal than anyone else here... i also talked to isaac i hope hes not aczually mad at me but he seems to have taken it lightly (note to myself: dont puplically insult creepy zombie men). im also glad that morti was on my side he said " keeping a journal can be quite helpfull in stressfull situations like these i fully support it in fact!" or something like that lol. maybe hes not a bad guy hes been nothing but nice to me but i just cant feel at ease around him... makes me feel kind of guilty but have you ever felt his skin??? of course you havent. your a computer haha but DUDEEE its freaky!
today was my first time visiting hell. its was a lot to take in... definetly scary and im a bit traumatized but also pretty cool. we were at a weird little restaurant and honestly i do not want to know what the food was made out of i was just glad to eat anything. i havent eaten anything in days... its not that im hungry (im not even sure if im still capable of being hungry) but i missed the feeling of eating. i even had a decent conversation with isaac. cant exactly say i like him but im wariming up to that little freak. he explained a lot of stuff about hell and everything to me it was a lot i still dont fully understand but very interesting ngl. i wish i could go back to my old flat tho... whos gonna feed pickle while im gone? i also need some more clothes i cant wear my old work uniform forever. maybe ill ask them to go back there and get my stuff later.
AWWWWWW U LIKE ME NOW? X3 admit it! also next time maybe choose a better password than "weezered4ever" HEH
alright whatever read it if you want to so badly... also that password rules and its secure as fuck it even has a number in it.
changed the wallpaper to this awsome demon today (fitting, i know) hope they like it
they didnt like it
damn i didnt write in here in forever lol ig i suck at keeping a diary. well ive never been much of a writing fan anyways...also im too lazy to fix all my typos and shit but who cares anyway. Sort of surreal to look back on these notes after months i do feel pretty well adjusted by now and im not AS nervous anymore. But still. i mean this is pretty fucked up. Especially just how easily you get desensitized to stuff?? i mean fuck a year ago i would go dizzy if i saw blood and now everything is just some crazy gore fest an i dont even care anymore. its more of a slight annoyance. sort of scary to think abt but ig im glad because otherwise everything would be way more difficult. Going on jobs i mean....but hey- im not that bad of an exorcist if i do say so myself! who would’ve guessed that? heh. even though we slack off a lot.
today was a lot... made me think about a lot of things. We were just doing some routine stuff and then we went to the graveyard and- well i met my mom. she was standing over an unnamed grave. and im pretty sure that what was burried underneath was the remains of my body. she didnt even know. When she saw me she acted like nothing was wrong "oh hey andrew- haven’t seen you in a while how's work? didnt think i would meet you here of all places" like what the hell man this is so not right.... i didnt know what to do at all i haven’t spoken with her in almost a year. i didnt want to think about it but it all came back that moment i was just frozen. and then she apologized. why did she have to do that. why just why now?? god... "places like these sort of make you think. I dont want you to hate me. haha just look at this poor bastard here. unnamed grave. i guess you never know when it could hit you... i dont want you to think i abandoned you andrew" man you have no idea... you really dont. i kind of just awkwardly hugged her. its like her words are just burned into my head now. i wish i didnt meet her there. she always has to make things difficult. i...i dont think i want to be dead anymore.